POST NASAL DRIP

The name people used for my skinny brother in grade school.  He was skinny as a post and his nose was always running.

BED WARMER

When the kerosine heater you have next to your bed catches the pizza boxes under your bed on fire then, you have a "Bed Warmer."

ROCKET FUEL

My dad's recipe for morning coffee.

EXCAVATOR

The technician who cleans my teeth.

PARALLEL TIME

The moments your child stands in the cold waiting for you to pick her up at school while you take a long winters nap after binge watching Ice Road Warriors.

SOCIALIST

One who always hits the "Like" button on every post on social media.

WELL WISHER

A person who wishes to throw you into a well.

NOSE WARMER

Every time Gregg the 6th grade bully would punch me in the face, the gushing blood would always made my nose warmer.

TIME WARP

The reason I never finished a physics exam.  Thank goodness the teacher graded on a curve.

PERSON OF INTEREST

My parents always told me that if I were a "person of interest" maybe I'd have some friends.

FAMINE

The intense feelings of hunger and panic when there is only one piece of pizza left and there are eight people in the room lusting for it.

SNOWBOUND

The result of eating two lbs of grated cheese on 1/2 lb of spaghetti.